(Monday, December 20, 2010)
SINGAPORE 9:31 PM
Back in those days, we've been beaten many times, or perhaps caned. At the age of 6 or 7 or maybe older a little, asking children to put their hands out, palms upwards, seems to be a burden. The reluctance can be told by their 'delay'. Come to think of it, a small tap of the long and thick cane on our mini hands can just cause us to explode into tears, although not really painful. It's weird, since it isn't really painful, why did we cry? Is it because of our overwhelming anxiety? Like the urgency to know what kind of punishments we will be receiving, so that we will be prepared to accept it or such. Certainly kept me wondering.
But as we age, maturity seems to change everything. We get harsher punishments, and definitely our 'delay' to accept punishments increase. However, we actually don't fear getting punished, but fear of feeling the pain and suffering. We lived long enough to know what kind of punishments our parents have for us, just that we are not prepared to take the blow.
Oh and another thing. Over the years, one then age. Fear conquers us all in the end, we no longer can fight it. We will be afraid of almost everything as we grow old. We lose our ignorance to our surroundings which we used to be when we are young. One can no longer ride a thrilling roller-coaster like he could when he was young. Paying attention or showing concern towards his own health, he fears the coaster, he fear he won't be able to take it if he took the thrilling ride.
Then one reach his eighties or nineties. He can't do anything much with his weak health now. If i were to put him in my shoes, I will just be fearing death almost all the time. You can't really think about anything else after going that far.
Fear is just like a stage 5 cancer, it spreads over time. From our youth to a stage whereby we could no longer hold on. Does 'fearless' even exist? Maybe in the dictionaries. Throughout our lives, all of us have definitely feared something? Pardon me if I'm wrong.
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